Harry Potter and Stupid Stuff: The Journal
by Allianator-Sinsationator
Summary: A private journal, now out to the public, of humorous Harry Potter ramblings by two average teenagers who obsess over things people would definitely not call normal...READ AND REVIEW!
1. Introduction! FromThe Allianator

Harry Potter and Stupid Stuff–The Journal

Comments:

**Hr/R is so going to happen**

**Voldemortawesome**

**Sims2 is cool!**

**Boohoo... Dumbledore dead**

**Snape is idiot**

**H/HR is inevitable-Sinsationator**

**H/Hr NEVER!-Allianator**

**Tigger-Elite**

**Allianator: **Hello and welcome to my notebook. If you are reading this, you are probably me, Alli Harpen. But if you are not me... you will be severely punished for reading this without my permission. (Unless, of course, you have my permission. In that case, keep reading and bear in mind that these threats are not pointed towards you:)

Where was I? O yea. How dare you invade my privacy! You are such an evil person! (Not as evil as U-No-Poo though, nobody's as evil as that). If you are still reading this, person-who's-not-supposed-to-still-be-reading-this, you will die in 7 days! Haha, scared you there, didn't I?

Ok, you caught me. Nothing's going to happen to you. I really don't care if you keep reading. You'll probably put the book down, anyway, because of my constant Harry Potter ramblings. You'll probably give it back to me with raised eyebrows. Your face will say, "You're an idiot," to me. Then, you'll voice your face and say, "You're an idiot". **Sinsationator: **and then Alli will say, "No, you're the idiot!" in a monotone voice.

**Allianator: **Now, I know you might think this whole thing is worthless... not even a fanfiction book, right? BUT THAT'S WHERE YOU'RE WRONG! This is, in real life, a composition notebook PACKED with Harry Potter fan fictions of all different genres. Right now, all you're doing is reading the introduction. And yesI admit, it is a bit stuupid, as the british would say. But, that's not my point. My point is that you should definitely keep reading, cause me and my best friend Sinsationator will have you twitching involuntarily on the ground, where you will have been laughing for the past half hour.

Oh, and also... beware of the other people that might sneak in. This includes **The Elite**... our friend Elise. And also, a girl named **Steph** might pop in sometimes too. They like Harry Potter as much as we do, if not a bit less. And they would like to feel included in our "stories".

So have fun reading people! And remember! Only you can change the future!


	2. Introduction! From The Sinsationator

**Introduction!**

**By: The Sinsationator**

Hi. Welcome to Alli's notebook. This is her best friend Sindi. But you can't really get who I am unless you see _my _notebook. So -rip- here's my welcome!

Hey! Welcome to my notebook. I'm Sindi McVander! Woot, woot! -takes bow- I know, you're probably expecting me to make a big deal about you reading my private notebook. Pshh! Who do you think I am? Alli?

Nahh. Go ahead and read. You'll probably throw it out the window in annoyance. -smiles evily- It's just filled to the brim with all my Harry Potter nonsense. And Avatar the Last Airbender. And Phantom of the Opera. And stuff. You'll probably come up to me and say, "You're an idiot!" And then I would say, "Go stick your head in Voldemort's Anus!" Ha, see all this stuff will probably go right over your head. There are so many inside jokes. There's two in this paragraph already, and you don't even know what they are!

You know, I bet Alli is reading this right now. Hi Alli! You're an idiot. Blah **Allianator: **Those few sentences had no point whatsoever, and you know it, since we say "You're an idiot" to each other at least 10 times a day.

**Sinsationator: **This whole notebook will be filled with Harry/Hermione, Zuko/Katara, and Phantom/Christine. It's just an inevitable fact, ALLI, because Ron/Hermione sucks. **Allianator: **Or maybe it's YOU that sucks... ooo burn.

**Sinsationator: **Erm... sorry. But you agree with Phantom/Christine and you don't ever care about Avatar until recently, so I'll cut you some slack. But if you infiltrate my notebook with the slightest R/HRness...

(Insert dead picture of Allie here)

**Allianator: **But YOU already infiltrated MY notebook with evil H/Hrness! So you should be dead by now! You should be worried. I know where you live. I know where you _sleep._

**Sinsationator: **Wooh. I think I have A.D.D., I keep getting off subject. So basically, this introduction is welcoming me, myself, Sindi, to my own notebook! Cause I am cool like that, and am worthy of being welcomed to my own notebook. If anyone is reading this -cough- Alli -cough- bear in mind the intro is not for you, because you are not cool enough, like I am. And I close this entry with a poem, as I am a genius too, and can write better poems then Alli (and she knows it)

**Allianator: **YA, WELL GO DUNK YOUR HEAD IN THE BLACK LAKE WITH YOUR HEAD STUCK IN VOLDEMORT'S ANUS AND ALL YOU CAN SEE IS WHITE AND YOU JUST REALIZE THAT VOLDEMORT IS NOT AFRICAN-AMERICAN!

**Sinsationator: **My poem:

If you love it the while you are doing it

you are a true expression of yourself

and your time and your story. You are authentic.


	3. FEEL THE HEAT! Our first fanfic war!

FEEL THE HEAT! 

**The Allianator vs. The Sinsationator**

****

****

_Disclaimer:We don't own Harry Potter!_

_Keep in mind we were limited to 5 sentances each._

_Also, we have a guest, or friend Elise, nick named, The Elite_

**Sinsationator: **Hermione woke up with a start, and grabbed her husband Harry Potter's arm. "It's okay, Herms, it was a nightmare," Harry soothed her.

**Allianator, angrily crosses out, and explains that we can't start with something HUGE like that and writes: **Hermione was very upset all summer because Harry had died fighting Voldemort. Ron had tried to soothe her, but she could not be soothed.

**S, says, "You contradicted yourself!" and crosses out angrily: **Harry plopped onto the blue couch next to Hermione, they had been researching horcruxes all night, and they were ready to sleep. Ron had fallen asleep 1 hour or so ago, and Hermione looked at him drooling on the table in disgust, as she said, "Ronald, that's gross!" even if he couldn't hear her.

**A: **Ron woke up and sucked in his drool, "1897!" he screamed. Hermione said, "Ron, help us, you need to, for Harry, you know... and me."

**S: **Hermione grabbed Harry's hand gently and said, "C'mon, I think I have an idea about the locket horcrux," and led him out of the room, Ron following them. She browght Harry to a familiar looking room where he remembered cleaning the Black's junk with Sirius.

**A: **Hermione stole a look at Ron, she wanted him to see her as she gripped Harry's hand tighter. He had seen her and his ears were reddening and his eyes were turning red also, she smiled, he was jealous.

**S: **Ahh, Ron's not getting it. I don't like Ron that way, and my ways of showing him aren't working, Hermione thought frustrated.

**A: **'But wait,' she thought, 'I don't like Harry that way either!' She let go of his hand instantly.

**S: **'But maybe... I do like Harry, but, wait no, I can't!' But she didn't know for sure, all she knew was that she couldn't think about that right now, there was a horcrux to find, so she grabbed Harry's hand again and brought him towards the closet

End of chapter ---------

**A: **We're he-arrrgghh!" Hermione screamed as a dark figure emerged from the shadows and appeared to be – Lord Voldemort!

"I'll save you, Hermione!" Ron stood up and was blasted off his feet by a Stunning spell.

**S: **Harry ran over to Hermione and grabbed her by the waist and pulled her aside as she stood paralyzed by shock, pushed her against the wall behind him, and turned to face Volde–

"Riddikulus!" Harry yelled, and the Voldemort Boggart disappeared.

**A: **Hermione rushed over to Ron and started shaking him violently. "Wake up, wake up!" she pleaded. She planted a wet kiss on his lips, and he started to stir.

**S: **Hermione wiped her mouth quickly, and looked up anxiously towards Harry, who was looking at her with a strange expression, for the only reason she had kissed Ron was so that he'd wake up, because she knew he liked her, but she difinetly didn't like Ron back that way.

"Ron, now look, I didn't mean-" But Hermione stopped and saw Harry storming off, and she followed him, anxiously, for she had to tell him something, important, and that was that she like him, Harry, and not Ron.

**A: **She caught up to him and said, "Now, Harry–" but he interrupted her. "I don't 'love' you Hermione, and I never will... You're just a great friend. Why don't you go back to Ron, I'm sure he'd like it," he said, a smile playing on his lips for Harry knew that Hermione and Ron were meant to be. Hermione nodded and headed off thinking, 'Well, there are other guys to like... like Ron...'

**S: **Well, that would have been the easy way for Hermione, but no, she had to tell Harry, so she grabbed his arm, drew her breath and said, "I know you do, don't lie!"

Harry looked at her with watery eyes, pulled her close, and kissed on the lips, running his hands through her hair, and Hermione sighed into him and whispered, "I love you, Harry, not Ron, and I always will love you."

**A: **Hermione woke up from her dream and gagged. That was the weirdest nightmare she had ever had, especially the part where she kissed Harry, "Blech!"

**The Elite enters the story here: **She got up and slowly made her way down the hall through Sirius's house. Hermione walked into the room where her dream took place. She stopped, there was Ron, on the floor, just like in her dream.

"HOLY ST!" she said.


	4. HUMOR! JUST PLAIN HUMOR! and romance

_**HUMOR! JUST PLAIN HUMOR!**_

Rules: One sentence each.

Must only be HUMOR! Straight Humor!

**Allianator: **Draco Malfoy arrived at Hogwarts.

**Sinsationator: **He strode in with his Grandpa Voldy.

**A: **Voldemort started talking about the Great Depression, but Malfoy silenced him.

**S: **"Grandpa, we're here, stop talking, they have butterbeer..." Voldemort squealed with excitement and said, "Mmm! Butterbeer!"

**A:** Voldemort killed Draco under the table.

**S: One, sec...What the heck? That was soooo random, and senile.**

**

* * *

****S: **Harry twirled around his girlfriend, Hermione Granger and slapped her bum saying, "Whopa!"

**A: **Hermione slapped him on the butt, and moved on to the next boy in the conga line.

**S: **Harry followed his girlfriend, and kept slapping her bum and saying, "Woot! Woot! Party in the Hogwarts!"

**A: **Hermione slapped him again, on the face, and moved onto Ron, who started kissing her fervishly, while she enjoyed.

**S: **Well, she pretended to, but then she slapped him and moved back to Harry, and they started dancing to "Old Time" songs.

**

* * *

**

**A: **Draco's ghost was after Hermione.

**S: **Harry trapped him in an ectoplasmic container forever, withe the help of Ron and Voldemort, Wait! What! Voldemort?

**A: **But he escaped and started kissing Hermione fervishly, as she enjoyed, even if she had Harry as a boyfriend (she's like that, you know).

S: **LIAR!**

**A, crosses out with an evil smile**

**S: **Harry sneaked up on Voldy and said, "It's time for you to die, Voldy!" and killed him, then he kissed Hermione in a makeout session which she enjoyed more than any other thing and said, "Whopa, back to you Honbun Harry!"

**A: **Hermione woke up from her dream and gagged because she had dreamed that Harry was her boyfriend and that would NEVER happen.

**S: **SHE WOKE UP FROM HER DREAM ABOUT DREAMING AND SMILED BECAUSE SHE LOVED FULL TIME MAKEOUTS WITH HER BOYFRIEND HARRY, HER ONE TRUE SOULMATE AND LOVE OF HER LIFE!

**A: **EXCEPT FOR RON, WHOM SHE LOVED EVEN MORE DEEPLY, AND SHE KNEW THAT THEY WERE BOTH MEANT TO BE!

**S: **Compared to Draco or Snape, but definitely not her beloved Harry Wabbit!

**A: **Hermione broke up with Harry that day, and said yes to Ron's request to go out with her.

**S: **Minerva killed Ron with one big, mind blowing, improper fart, and Hermione came out of the imperious curse she was under by Ron and went back to Harry, who accepted her and loved her dearly, as she loved him.

**A: **But then Minerva turned her big butt onto Harry, and he died of the fumes too; the only person to talk to now was the ghost of Draco who wanted her love forever.

**S: **But the ectoplasmic case disappeared when Harry died. So Hermione used a time-turner she had stolen from the Headmistress's office and brought Harry back to life, but not Ron, she didn't want that loser alive.

**A:** But fate had chosen Harry to die and she could not resurrect people; in other words, she could never talk to her ex again.

**A/N: **We had loads of fun making this one, and we hope you had as much fun reading it... Please read and review please, we'd like to know your views and if you think there are anything we should change...

If you support Ron/Hermione... YOU ROCK! -cough- this is Alli...

That reminds me also... When your reviewing, please share with us whether you agree with The Sinsationator-meaning you beleive in Harry/Hermione- or The Allianator- meaning you beleive in Ron/Hermione. We like to use that against each other... hehe.


	5. An invitation :

Hello all you good peoples! Sorry, this is not another chapter. It is an invitation….

* * *

_**YOU HAVE BEEN CORDIALLY INVITED TO JOIN THE NEWEST ROLEPLAYING GUILD ON FANFICTION. NET. THE MAGIC OF HOGWARTS!**_

_**PLEASE VISIT OUR FORUM AND JOIN TODAY! ALSO, A BIGGER, BETTER VERSION OF THE MAGIC OF HOGWARTS RPG WILL BE COMING ON THE WEB IN FEBRUARY! THANK YOU, AND HAVE A GREAT DAY**_

_.:Alliantor-Sinsationator or Headmistress Elle-Headmistress Lydia:._


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